I have enjoyed hearing from a large group of new readers (presumably from the Wrestlecrap link), and sincerely hope that you all bookmark and continue to visit Lethal! We have an extremely talented (but sometimes lazy) staff of writers and I guarantee you'll find plenty of ooey-gooey wrestling-related goodness on the FRONT PAGE.

And if you're interested in back-and-forth discussion on wrestling, current events, sports, TV and movies, I'd recommend a visit to our FORUMS (which may or may not be working at this particular moment- they're funny like that sometimes).

Now that all of that shilling is out of the way, I wanted you all to know that due to fervent (look it up) reader demand, I've decided to make "What's Going On?" a weekly feature, grabbing some of WWE.com's vidcaps from RAW and Smackdown and given them the business.

So without further adieu... "What's Going On?"

In this picture, Ric Flair is mad because Eric Bischoff said:
A. "Triple H must defend his World Title tonight."
B. "I think you went a little overboard with the hair gel, Naitch."
C. "Remember when I fired you and took you off TV for 6 months. That was great, huh?"

In this picture:
A. Ric Flair issues a post-match beatdown to the Hurricane
B. Hurricane learns the hard way that Ric Flair doesn't "swing like that"
C. Shane Helms' visit to the local senior center takes a turn for the worse after he refuses to play a fifteenth game of UNO

In this picture, The Rock's head most resembles:
A. A peanut
B. A penis
C. The octopus from Spongebob Squarepants

In this titillating picture:
A. We witness an old-school squash match
B. Rodney Mack powerslams his opponent "Whitey Caucasian"
C. Rodney Mack 3:19 says "We just sucked each other off in mid-air!"

In this picture, Booker T asks:
A. "Can I trust you as a partner?"
B. "Did Bret Hart really fuck Sunny?"
C. "I thought you were a black porn star with the huge cock. What gives?"

The most disturbing thing about this image is:
A. Lita's pants
B. The fact that I will never get into Lita's pants
C. That dipshit in the audience who reinforces every redneck stereotype by wearing overalls to a "wrasslin' show"

Eric Bischoff tells Lita she can keep her job if she:
A. Poses for Playboy
B. Stops wearing those stupid pants
C. Munches on his wife's Sideways Sloppy Joe and lets him watch

In this picture, Triple H is upset because:
A. He must "defend" his " world title"
B. Ric Flair used all of his hair gel again
C. He is just months away from marrying a sea cow with implants

In this picture, Test yells:
A. "If you grope Stacey again, I'll get mad and we'll have a horrible match at the next PPV"
B. "You'd be mad too if your girlfriend lost her cherry to David Flair"
C. "I just want to love you, why do you keep pushing me away?"

In this picture, Kevin Nash exclaims:
A. "It's great to be back on TV!"
B. "I just want to get back in that ring and injure myself again."
C. "There's no way that bitch Trish Stratus has nicer hair than me."

By singing a song to Terri Runnels, The Rock:
A. Redefines sports "entertainment"
B. Makes Goldust sad and jealous
C. Has a 75% of getting herpes, AIDS and the clap

In this picture:
A. The Rock talks to Lillian Garcia
B. The Rock prepares to backhand Lillian Garcia
C. Lillian Garcia does what she does best: NOTHING

In this picture, the Rock:
A. Taunts Goldberg
B. Angers Norman Smiley by doing "The Big Wiggle"
C. Caught a fish "this big"

In this picture, Gillberg:
A. Assists The Rock in taunting Goldberg
B. Earns enough money to make a double mortgage payment this month
C. Dances a traditional Irish jig, much to the consternation (look it up) of The Rock

By walking to the ring, Goldberg:
A. Is preparing to retaliate against The Rock
B. Draws a decent pop from the crowd
C. Earns more money than Gillberg will earn this entire year

By standing in his own pyro, Goldberg:
A. Looks scary and impressive
B. Looks like an ass
C. Will put his eye out

In this heart-breaking moment, Gillberg realizes:
A. Goldberg is coming to kick his ass
B. The long-term contract Vince promised him was just a ruse
C. "They're not laughing with me, they're laughing at me."

As he prepares for his match, Spike Dudley wonders:
A. "How can I make this match as entertaining as possible?"
B. "How is it possible that I am still employed by the WWF?"
C. "When did Trish turn into a frog-faced mutant?"

In this picture, The Rock:
A. Looks down upon a lesser sports entertainer
B. Growls like a rabid dog
C. Smells the juicy pizza fart he just ripped moments ago

In this picture, Goldberg:
A. Lies broken and battered at the hands of The Rock
B. Faces Mecca and prays to Allah
C. Is still making more than Gillberg

In this picture, Kevin Nash says:
A. "I am going to beat my opponent."
B. "I'd rather be back in paid rehab."
C. "Shawn, you know how I get when I see you in stripes. Rrraar!"

A good name for this picture would be:
A. "World Champion Triple H"
B. "Time to Play the Game!"
C. "Bloated Ass with Water Bottle"

Special referee Shawn Michaels:
A. Warns Triple H to "keep it clean"
B. Asks Booker if he has seen his smile
C. Shows Triple H and Booker how Vince likes his handjobs (tight fist, close to the face)

An angry Kevin Nash exclaims:
A. "Big Sexicutioner Oz Diesel Vinnie Nash The Giant Kevin Killer Vegas will have his revenge!"
B. "I told you to tear my quad! How am I supposed to get back to paid rehab with two good quads?"
C. "Fuck you Trish, my hair is WAY prettier than yours!"

This picture is humorous because:
A. Triple H actually thinks fans care about him
B. Ric Flair took his jacket off and you can see his nipples
C. The World Title is involved, so of course Jericho is cut out of the picture

In this picture, John Cena:
A. Cuts a promo on Brock Lesnar
B. Wear a Masteezie Leezie around his neezie like they dizzle in the ghizzle
C. Uses the Dark Arts to make the word "DOWN" appear in mid-air above his hand

As Rhyno jobs to John Cena:
A. Cena is established as an "up and coming" star
B. Rhyno thinks "Sure glad I came back for this"
C. Paul Heyman sobs like a dateless fat girl on prom night

In this picture, Roddy Piper is:
A. Carrying Sean O'Haire's luggage
B. Wearing a shirt that says "HER'S FIT!"
C. Just happy to be employed

In this picture, Taz says:
A. "Welcome back to Smackdown."
B. "Are those damn cameras on yet?"
C. "Come on Cole, just one kiss..."

In this picture:
A. Sables uses her "beauty" to "seduce" Josh Matthews
B. Josh harnesses all of his strength to avoid vomiting on Sable
C. Josh closes his eyes to avoid being turned to stone by the ancient Medusa

A good name for this picture would be:
A. "Rabid Wolverine in Action"
B. "Crossface Submission"
C. "Elbow on Cock"

In this picture, Tajiri and Funaki watch:
A. Big Show fume over suffering a 619 from Rey Mysterio
B. "America's Fattest Home Videos"
C. The new PBS educational series "Where in the World is Big Show's Ham?"

In this picture, Crash Holly is:
A. Continuing his flourishing career as a gimmick leech
B. Number 2 Mattitude Follower
C. Just Number 2

In this picture, Crash Holly is:
A. About to do the job
B. Wishing Rey Mysterio would have worn a jockstrap
C. Still just Number 2

In this picture, Rey Mysterio:
A. Makes the V1 sign
B. Is wearing MIchael Jackson's contact lenses from the Thriller video
C. Invites Matt to see what Lita's snapper smells like these days

In this picture, Sean O'Haire thinks:
A. "I am a very strong man"
B. "I could give a Samoan the Samoan Drop. Oh the bitter irony."
C. "Holy shit Rikishi, it's time to lay off the Chinese Buffet House"

As Nidia poses for the cameras:
A. 14-year old boys across the nation touch themselves in an improper fashion
B. She reflects on how glad she is to have left her stripping career behind
C. Al Snow sits in his living room and shakes his head in disgust

As Dawn Marie poses for the cameras:
A. She declares "touchdown"
B. The memory of Al Wilson lives on
C. Simon Diamond sits in his living room and shakes his head in disgust

As Torrie Wilson pushes her ass up against Sable:
A. She is surprised to feel Sable's penis pushing back
B. Marc Mero sits in his living room and shakes his head in disgust
C. Billy Kidman sits in his living room and shakes his head in disgust

In this picture, Big Show:
A. Gorilla slams Tajiri
B. Becomes the #1 contender for the Cruiserweight Title
C. Is positive it was Tajiri who stole his ham

In this picture, Big Show:
A. Throws the ring steps at Rey Mysterio
B. Takes out his frustrations from being excluded from "Celebrity Trading Spaces"
C. Follows up on a hot lead that his ham was hidden under the steps

In this picture, Brock Lesnar carries:
A. An oxygen tank
B. A weapon of mass destruction
C. Stephanie McMahon's vibrator

In this picture, Stephanie McMahon says:
A. "I am the General Manager of Smackdown"
B. < Chandler voice > "Could I BE any uglier?" < /Chandler voice >
C. "These tits cost more than your education"

In this picture, Brock Lesnar:
A. Gets a amateur-style takedown on Albert
B. Works with another one of the Smackdown "main eventers"
C. Is deeply lacerating his face on Albert's back stubble

In this picture, Brock Lesnar:
A. Fails to make a rest hold look like it hurts
B. Is attacked by Boris Zhukov
C. Prays to the Lord above for a new career

In this picture, Brock Lesnar:
A. Isn't bleeding enough to satiate (look it up) the hanger of the fans who love violence
B. Suffers through the aftermath of rubbing his face on Albert's back
C. Is just happy he isn't doing a shooting star press

Whew. This takes more time than you would think. Glad to have another one in the can. Time to wrap it up and head home...

Backlash is now only a few hours off, and I may or may not slide over to the local Hooters to check it out. Nothing really looks like a standout match, although it will be interesting to see if Cena and Lesnar can hold their own without an experienced vet in the ring to carry the lion's share of the match. I miss Angle already. And what's up with no Maven on the card?

Until next time, keep fighting the good fight...

NormanB
AIM NormanB258

You HAVE to e-mail me now. I'm getting spoiled.