UFC On FX UFC 147 Combo Burrito Means You Eat Well Feat. Cruelty

Sup hoes, yall enjoying LeBron’s first ring yet? We’re back, and reviewing TWO main cards, because we love you. If you want to hear us talk about these fights via podcast, check my twitter for a link to the show Saturday afternoon. If you want to figure out whos typing below, watch the fonts – I’m italics remember? Without further waiting…

UFC ON FX

Cub Swanson over Ross Pearson – Round 3 JD
Swanson likes to bang but he’s also a pretty slick grappler. His most recent loss was to an inferior opponent in Ricardo Lamas. He made a mistake that got him caught, but before that transition and sub he was looking very good. Otherwise he has been very impressive. He’s not a smart fighter and, if it wasn’t for his connection to Greg Jack, I would predict he’d indulge Pearson in a boxing match that he would lose. Instead I think MMA Yoda will tell him to take this fight to the ground where he has a clear advantage. Pearson is coming along with his groundgame but he still needs to win by landing volume. Similar to Sam Stout who we’ll see later in the card, he tends to let fighters hang around… even when he’s dominating. If he had finishing power I’d consider picking him to land on Swanson, who can get wild at times, and finish… but he doesn’t so I’m predicting a loss where he spends too much time on his back.

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UFC 146 – We’re Still Upset With Reem Out, But Anyways…. Feat. Cruelty

Sup folks, ya boys are back. Everyone loves big dudes slanging leather, so everyone should enjoy this card. As always I’m italics, Cruelty isnt, fuck big intros, LETS GO!!!

Mike Thomas Brown over Daniel Pineda – Round 1 KO

I watched a few Daniel Pineda fights and didn’t see much talent, yet somehow he has wins over some decent guys recently in the UFC. His striking defense looks weak and Mike Brown has big power. I think he’ll catch Pineda and ruin his streak.

Mike Brown over Daniel Pineda – UD
Brown still getting fights actually makes me happy, because dudes fun to watch. Pineda will attempt to get this to the mat, fail, and get beat around for 3 rounds. Can we get a Brown/Torres II already?

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UFC 145 – Jones Will Rescue Cats From Trees Before Title Defense Feat. Cruelty

Como esta putas? Ya boys are back, it must be fight night! I’m out the door to watch some fights in Hanford so I gotta hit the road. Same drill, I’m italics, Cruelty isnt,LETS GO!

Maximo Blanco over Marcus Brimage – Round 3 JD
Brimage fought on Iron Ring, but I can’t derive much from that because I don’t know if he was on T.I.’s team, Luda’s team, or Mayweather’s trainer that didn’t believe in submission holds. In the UFC he sure looked one-dimensional. Blanco isn’t a great striker but he will have a big edge and he can finish guys. Brimage will try to take this to the gound, but Blanco is a good grappler too. Blanco will batter Brimage on the feet and it’ll be close on the ground.

Edit. Note – Cruelty is the only white person on the planet who watched Iron Ring. Did you watch BET Movies after this was over? Soul Plane? Whats Love Got To Do With It? Thin Line Between Love And Hate? BAPS? I need to know.

Maximo Blanco over Marcus Brimage – TKO Rd 1
This is a badass opener. Brimage is getting a stand up fight that I’m sure he wants, only Blanco punches just as hard and has solid technique. Will Brimage try and use wrestling? It’s not a bad idea. I doubt it, he’s going to want to scrap, and pay for it.

Keith Wisniewski over Chris Clements – Round 3 JD
Wisniewski is coming off a loss but his opponent in that fight, Josh Neer, has been really solid lately. I feel like Wis upped his game recently and I see him being a UFC newcomer with no great takedown defense.

Keith Wisniewski over Chris Clements – JD
Classic striker vs. grappler match up. Clements has heavy hands but has been subbed but good grapplers and I wonder if Keith can grab a limb here. FYI from here on out I will forever refer to Keith as “The Polish Connection” because that nickname is too badass to not use. Suck on that Andrew Golata!

Mac Danzig over Efrain Escudero – Round 2 Submission (RNC)
Escudero really showed some grappling deficiencies in his last fight, and Danzig looked pretty good against Wiman. I like Danzig to doggedly pursue takedowns and eventually find a dominant position for a win.

Mac Danzig over Efrain Escudero – JD
The two biggest TUF Winners Who Ended Up Being Pretty Average facing eachother? Can we make this a Loser Leaves Town? Danzig should be able to grapplefuck Efrain for 3 rounds.

John Makdessi over Anthony Njokuani – Round 2 TKO
Both guys are coming off losses because they can’t grapple for shit, so lets have a kickboxing match and loser leaves town. Both guys will land a bit, and I like Makdessi’s power.

Anthony Njokuani over John Makdessi – JD
On paper this should be pretty good. Two good strikers, one from one of the better camps around, this has the makings for a fun throwdown. I lean Njokuani because of those great kicks he throws. He’s gonna grab two of the three rounds.

Stephen Thompson over Matt Brown – Round 3 JD
Matt Brown has managed to hang around UFC but he’s a very average fighter in all areas except basic punching power. Thompson is a pure kickboxer so this is a good step-up for him, because Brown will try to take him down… but isn’t actually too good at it. Thompson has some promise but a good wrestler would embarrass him, so we’ll give him some practice stuffing shots by a brawler. Thompson will stay FAR away from Brown and look to land when Brown moves into the edge of his range… then he’ll run away. They’re going to show Thompson’s recent highkick KO, but I hope they keep the tape rolling because I loved his celebration I wrote in my notes as a “sick flying barrel roll into a Tebow.” Headkicks for Jesus!

Stephen Thompson over Matt Brown – Rd 2 TKO
WONDERBOOYYYY WHAT IS THE SECRET OF YOUR POWWWERRRSSSS???? Thompson impressed everyone with his crazy kick KO, and I’m a bit worried that Brown could give him THE BIZNAZZ by turning this into a “chest to chest grind it out against the cage” fight. I had my “Brown keeps his job beating average guys” rant last time he fought so I wont go there again. I got faith that Wonderboy will eventually land a big kick or knee and drop Brown, then finish with punches on the ground. If Rogan’s first question is “Wont you take us far away from the mucky muck?” I will mark.

Travis Browne over Chad Griggs – Round 1 KO
Browne moves pretty well for a big guy, and Griggs doesn’t seem to have much more than sloppy wrestling. Browne trains with Phil Davis and some other good grapplers and I think he’s seen better than what Griggs has to offer. His offensive wrestling looked legit in his last fight, but he won’t need it this time. He headhunts and catches Griggs early.

Chad Griggs over Travis Browne – TKO Rd 2
Torn over this fight. Leaning Griggs because I’m not sure Browne has been in a nasty grind em out fight yet, at least I’ve yet to see it. Griggs loves to wear cats out and also has some pop in his gloves, but he shouldnt try and stand with Browne. Make it ugly, grind it out, finish with G & P later in the fight.

Miguel Torres over Michael McDonald – Round 3 JD
McDonald is like 12 years old and has nasty bacne, but he’s a pretty good striker already. Actually, Torres has terrible skin, too. This fight: brought to you by Proactiv! Both fighters have great accuracy and reach for this weightclass, so it will interesting to see these guys with those advantages minimized. I think very highly of Torres and basically pick him against anyone who isn’t an elite wrestler. Torres will bring leg kicks that help him outscore McDonald, but this will be fun as both guys will bring crazy fast-twitch action.

Michael McDonald over Miguel Torres – JD
Another tough fight to pick. I got some love for McDonald, he’s a central valley kid who made his name fighting around here, and this is by far his biggest fight. I’m going “Younger lion eats older lion” theory here. Torres has to be at the end of his career right? I love the guy but he’s really at that point where he’s almost a gatekeeper and I hate for him to have that tag. McDonald takes two of the three rounds, avoids Torres big right hand, and steals one.

John Alessio over Mark Bocek – Round 3 JD
I feel like both of these guys have been around forever because they debuted early and won enough to hang around the UFC fringe. Bocek is a slow, determined grappler who generally gets the takedown eventually. I don’t see that happening here. Alessio has good td defense and he has a MAJOR handspeed advantage. Bocek punches like he’s underwater, and Alessio has quick boxing combos.

John Alessio over Mark Bocek – JD
Alessio has put in work tho. Dude has been fighting forever. He’s faced the better competition, and although both come from great camps, I think he does enough to steal this fight. Honestly Bocek has never really impressed me. He hasnt evolved as a fighter. Bocek does the same shit he did 3 years ago, and he wasnt beating anyone great then either.

Mark Hominick over Eddie Yagin – Round 1 TKO
Striker vs striker again, and both guys coming off losses so they will be hungry. Hominick came out full of emotions and got blasted, but he’s a talented striker and he’ll bounce back with a win. Yagin has an inflated win total and he’s about to go back to the Hawaiian brawler circuit where he belongs.

Mark Hominick over Eddie Yagin – KO Rd 1
Interesting fight. Has Hominick recovered mentally over the loss of his trainer, and his quick KO loss? Are his best days behind him? Will he get gun shy? Will Yagin come out guns blazing just to test the chin? (My guess is yes) I like Eddie, he’s a nice guy, but he’s being brought in to rebuild Hominick’s confidence, and get him back into the title mix. I dont think Eddie is going to be able to capitalize. Mark sleeps him.

Brendan Schaub over Ben Rothwell – Round 2 KO
Schaub was looking pretty good against an aging legend Minotauro Nogueira before the collective prayers of the PRIDE WILL NEVER DIE crowd gave Minotauro the power to batter him senseless. Rothwell fought another Pride veteran Mark Hunt when he was also fighting illness, and Hunt + microbes beat his ass. Rothwell hasn’t done anything in years, and Schaub is slowly improving. They will see each other at the crossroads like Bone Thugz (what’s up 1990s!) and Rothwell will take the fork toward the next Bellator HW tournament.

Brendan Schaub over Ben Rothwell – TKO Rd 1
I’ve become a Schaub fan. Not just because he got tired and allowed Nog to tee the fuck off on him and give me one last awesome memory of my favorite fighter ever. Have you seen the video’s of this guy getting pranked? He’s a good sport, even when someone blends his phone, or makes him dress like a ballerina. The kid has grown on me. Rothwell hasnt done anything to impress me since coming over. I was initially excited to see what he brought, and all he brought was the fat. He’s not as fat now, so maybe he brings some fight this time? I think Schaub clips him early and finishes strong.

Rory MacDonald over Che Mills – Round 3 TKO
Mills lives up to the stereotype of Brits being bad grapplers. MacDonald is a solid all-around fighter and he’ll be able to take advantage of Che Mills’ deficiency on the ground. Rory can hang in the standup until he can get a clinch takedown and pile up damage from the top-position.

Rory MacDonald over Che Mills – JD
Man Rory has had some tough fights in the UFC already. Condit, Diaz, and Pyle already? And he’s 22? Goddamn son. Mills is the typical “UK Brawlers Gonna Brawl” that MacDonald should be able to outgrapple. Maybe Che can keep it standing and keep it interesting? I doubt it. Rory is a pretty smart kid. I smell a 3-0 sweep here.

Jon Jones over Rashad Evans – Round 3 TKO
The UFC marketing team is fantastic lately. The promotions for this fight really play up the rivalry and make it believable. These are two proud fighters who wanted to be the top dog at Jackson’s, and in the end Greg chose Jones. Rashad found good partners to train with, and he is the more mature fighter and man. Jones is still wild and arrogant, but his talent will carry him. Evans is a good athlete and slick, but his chin isn’t amazing and Jones will touch it. I don’t give Rashad an advantage in any area but he is good at managing the pace of a fight and he will survive by clinching and circling away when he gets in trouble. In the end, though, Rashad is just another name Jones will add to some dumb bragging speech that includes too many Bruce Lee quotes.

Jon Jones over Rashad Evans – JD
I’ve grown to respect the shit outta Jones sillset, but hate the kid himself. He’s just all types of cocky and cant hide it no matter how humble he tries to come across. He should just go full Maywether and go “Fuck MMA fans, U MAD BECAUSE I SMOKED ALL YOUR HEROES??” Rashad has had a rough last few months with his broad bailing, his coach bailing, can someone check and see if he had any pets bail on him? I’m hoping he turns all this into a megaball of hate/anger/I NEED TO PROVE TO THE WORLD THAT I CAN DO THIS and smokes Jones chin. But I doubt it. Jones is just a level better then EVERYONE at 205. He really is on some Prime Roy Jones Jr. shit and we all need to enjoy because we may not see it again. I’m hoping he moves to HW and we can have some competition at 205 again to be honest. Rashad will find a way to win maybe two rounds, but Jones is going to dominate and win rounds big.

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UFC 144 – JMMA Will Never Die, Just Multiply Feat. Cruelty

Sup famron? Ya boys have taken a break from LINSANITY to hit you with that picks post on what is clearly a stacked goddamn card. I get a bit nostalgic thinking about when Cruelty wrote about the good ole days of MMA in Japan, when they had the best fighters, the best fights, the best cards, and roids filling the veins of all legendary fighters provided by the Yakuza! I’ve got a whole post to mark out tho, so let’s get moving. I’m italics, Cruelty isn’t, LETS GO!!

Issei Tamura over Zhang Tiequan – Rd 3 JD

I lost all faith in Tiequan when I saw him trying to work off his back against Darren Elkins. He has a terrible guard and his in-fight strategy is worse. He’s beaten guys who are inferior wrestlers, and Tamura isn’t bad in that one department. Tamura is not a great fighter but I think he can get on top, stay safe, and win a boring upset decision. FINALLY REVENGE FOR THE RAPE OF NANKING

Tiequan Zhang over Issei Tamura – TKO Rd 1
Zhang kind of impressed me in his debut fight with the UFC. He gave Elkins fits and Elkins aint a slouch on the mat. Tamura has a weird record. I think he gets overwhelmed. Also, no TUF on TUF opener? Welcome to Japan!

Takeya Mizugaki over Chris Cariaso – Rd 3 JD

Cariaso has been around UFC and WEC for years but I haven’t been terribly impressed. He does try to brawl a bit, though, so I like this matchup for an action fight. Mizugaki throws volume punches and Cariaso will play along. I think Mizugaki is a bit more accurate and should outpoint the American in a crowd-pleaser while we’re all trying to figure out what channel we’re watching UFC on THIS time.

Chris Cariaso over Takeya Mizugaki – Sub Rd 2
Mizugaki is a bit worn tho no? Cariaso is on my “Guys we should pay attention to” list, he’s still young, and has an interesting record filled with solid wins. I think he finds a choke on the finished TK later in the fight.

Steve Cantwell over Riki Fukuda – Rd 3 TKO

In Cantwell’s last fight Mike Massensio made his face into a bloody wreck, and Fukuda is coming back from a bloody wreck in a car. I think Fukuda actually might be more talented, but I don’t like picking him to win after such a long layoff. Cantwell is a decent brawler and wrestler. Fukuda will empty his gas tank trying for takedowns, and Cantwell will batter him late.

Riki Fukuda over Steve Cantwell – JD
Fukuda quietly has a solid ass record. Wins over Ninja, Villasenior, Sakura. Cantwell still does not impress me. I think Fukuda steals this fight via grapplefuck and shady Jap judging.

Norifumi Yamamoto over Vaughan Lee – Rd 1 TKO

Kid Yamamoto really hasn’t done much in years. At this point he’ll never live up to early hype, but he can still win a few fights. Lee is a well-rounded fighter who doesn’t seem to have good top control or KO power. He’s generally won by tapping non-grapplers and Kid is too veteran for that. Lee will have to come in close to dirty box and Kid will flurry on him in the transition.

Kid Yamamoto over Vaughn Lee – TKO Rd 1
Lee is brought in to job. Maybe he can grapplefuck Kid? I doubt it. I smell early KOTN fight.

Takanori Gomi over Eiji Mitsuoka – Rd 1 KO

Mitsuoka might actually be a less disciplined fighter than Gomi, and that’s saying a lot. Gomi is going to come and swing for the fences while Mitsuoka grabs desperately for a takedown. Two fights in a row, a washed up Japanese fighter gives the Japanese crowd an opportunity to remember the good old days of JMMA.

Takanori Gomi over Eifi Mitsuoka – JD
Shit I’m wondering if Mitsuoka can grapplefuck Gomi. Assuming we see Gomi use some decent footwork, stay away from takedowns, and score enough standing to win 2 of the 3 rounds.

Anthony Pettis over Joe Lauzon – Rd 1 KO

I was resisting the urge to join the Pettis bandwagon for a long time. I find his swagger irritating and that probably biased me, but he fucking dominated Jeremy Stephens and that white trash motherfucker is a good fighter. He showed that he has good jits and wrestling to go with his “showtime” standup so I’m thinking he’ll kill Creepy Joe. Joe is coming off a nice victory over a flawed fighter in Melvin Guillard but Pettis has an edge in every category.

Anthony Pettis over Joe Lauzon – TKO Rd 1
Fuck I love this fight. Can Lauzon get this fight to the mat? Can his weird Diaz-like stance fuck with Pettis? I’m guessing not. Pettis’ stand up is still next level, and J-Lau’s chin is shaky. Not going to end well for J-Lau.

Hatsu Hioki over Bart Palaszewski – Rd 3 JD

Bart is a tough guy but that’s about all you can say about him. He’s a good striker who – yes I realize he’s coming off a KO – doesn’t really have great power. Hioki is going to get takedowns and Bart doesn’t have great offense off his back.

Bart Palaszewski over Hatsu Hioki – TKO Rd 1
Again, I love this fight. This card really has a “Bushido” feel to it. All these great lighter guys in big fights with solid match ups. Think this is a toss up. If Hioki gets this to the ground Bart’s in a world of trouble, and we get the rarely seen CRAZEE JAP SUB!! If Bart keeps this standing, he probably finishes Hioki, and that’s rare. I’m leaning to Bart catching Hioki early, and finishing him with strikes on the ground.

Yushin Okami over Tim Boetsch – Rd 2 TKO

Anderson Silva is the best to ever fight at 185. I just wanted to point that out real quick because I’m picking Okami to win pretty convincingly, and Anderson just clowned in a couple months ago. Boetsch is still a long way from being a good striker or submission fighter, and his power wrestling game is not gonna work on Okami. Boetsch is slow and Okami will be able to land his boxing, which actually looked improved during the ASilva fight. He couldn’t hit Anderson but this is not the same thing.

Yushin Okami over Tim Boetsch – JD
Okami is going to give Boetsch fits once they grapple, and they will grapple. He’s going to give Boetsch a shitload of problems, but wont finish him. Okami is in the Fitch group of guys that are great fighters who cannot beat the champ. But majority of the guys at 185 are in that group so…

Jake Shields over Yoshihiro Akiyama – Round 3 JD

A female friend of mine once told me that she doesn’t mind if a guy is uncircumcised because, as she put it, “it’s more dick.” Using her disgusting yet technically accurate logic, I’m worried that Sexyama will be less sexy having cut down to 170. That’s 15 pounds less sexy, according to my MMA Nickname math. I’m not sure how the cut will help him, because he generally relies on speed and technique. Is he going to bring a power judo game to welterweight? Nah Jake Shields is going to take him down. Shields is also a big 170 and he won’t struggle with cardio like the Akiyama will after his first cut to this weight. Shields will take him down and ugly up Akiyama’s super tan face on the way to a loss to GSP in 2013.

Jake Shields over Yoshihiro Akiyama – Sub Rd 3
Will Sexyama finally bring sexy back? Did he lose his mojo like Austin Powers, or Rob Lowe? JK Rob Lowe still gets mad pussy on the reg. Shields is going to make this sloppy, use ugly striking and smother the sexy one, wear Sexyama out, and get an armbar later in the fight. Shields should stick around 170 as long as he can make the weight.

Mark Hunt over Cheick Kongo – Rd 2 KO

I love Mark Hunt for trying a sloppy armbar against Ben Rothwell. He’s definitely here for a paycheck only, but he actually tried to learn some grappling. These guys should probably both try to get takedowns to avoid danger, but I’m hoping they just kickbox because watching these two big guys show off their high school quality wrestling for 15 minutes while huffing and puffing is going to be very embarrassing. I like Hunt in the kickboxing match because Kongo let stumpy Pat Barry get inside so Hunt can do it, too. If it becomes a wrestling match I don’t give a fuck about the outcome.

Mark Hunt over Chieck KONGO! – KO Rd 1
Seriously tho, this is so throwback Japan. Mark fucking Hunt! If Kongo was smart, he would post Hunt up on the cage, try and take him down, smother him, make this a boring fight, and steal a W. I think he leaves his chin out trying to test Hunt and make shit interesting, and gets clipped something buck fucking nasty. This is probably my ZOMG PRIDE NEVER DIES moment of the night.

Quinton Jackson over Ryan Bader – Rd 1 KO

Bader’s standup is like a twitchy statue but he has big power, and he’s coming off a KO. This might give him some misguided confidence because Rampage is coming off a dismantling by Jon Jones. I don’t read too much into the Jones loss and I think Rampage is still sufficiently talented to hover around the top of the division when he’s motivated. That last loss was ugly, and he will be motivated to redeem himself with a quality win against Bader. Because he’s a twitchy statue, Bader will be an easy target for Rampage and this will be over quickly.

Rampage Jackson over Ryan Bader – KO Rd 1
So I’m seeing that Rampage had some weigh in issues, and told some people doctors in America told him he shouldnt fight. Built in excuses? Is Page having too much fun in Japan? At the end of the day I’m not sure it will matter. Bader is going to get swallowed up by the moment, not be able to get a takedown, and get throttled by Rampage hooks.

Frankie Edgar over Ben Henderson – Rd 5 JD

I really like Frankie Edgar’s style against Ben’s. Frankie will circle and box while Bendo is forced to chase him around. Bendo will stuff early takedowns but eventually he will be too distracted with the boxing and Frankie will hit a couple doubles. Even if Bendo is only on his back for a minute, it will still score a little bit. This should be fast paced but relatively one-sided.


Ben Henderson over Frankie Edgar – JD
Really tempted to pick Bendo via sub, but Frankie is so fucking game, trains with Gracie’s, FUUCCKKKKK this fight is sick. Mega props to Dana for this as the cherry on top of this card. There’s no way it sucks with this line up right? I expect a full out war, potential FOTY, both guys are equal standing and on the mat, even though they have different styles. I truly believe Bendo is Bones/Reem/Aldo level, and will prove it after this fight. He’s winning 3 of the 5 rounds, and we’re going to be lucky enough to watch this go down again.

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The Lethal Women Of Rasslin Tournament: Sweet Eight

Okay so the delay between the third round and the final four went on a little longer then it should have. Despite rumors to the contrary, I have an actual life now (well more then I did before) so I’m sorry if you were waiting on pins and needles for these results.

Anyway here are the results for round three.

Maria defeats Stacy Keibler 76.19% to 23.81%

Dawn Marie defeats Kimberly Page 71.43% to 28.57%

Aksana defeats Francine 51% to 49%

Christy Hemme defeats Traci Brooks 84.62% to 15.38%

A.J. Lee defeats Brook Adams 75% to 25%

Maryse defeats Lita 76.92% to 23.08%

Molly Holly defeats Melina Perez 92.31% to 7.69%

Trish Stratus defeats Tara 69.23% to 30.77%

So after a long and exhausting tournament so far, here is your Lethal Entertainment Women Of Rasslin Sweet Eight

To vote just click on the link below the pictures of each match and vote for your favorite.

Wrestler’s Bracket
Trish Stratus

vs.
Molly Holly

Trish Stratus vs. Molly Holly

Maryse
vs.
A.J. Lee

Maryse vs. A.J. Lee

Valets Bracket
Christy Hemme

vs.
Aksana

Christy Hemme vs. Aksana

Dawn Marie

vs.
Maria

Dawn Marie vs. Maria

All polls close on the morning of Feb 24th, 2012 so vote early and vote often.

COMMENT as you see fit.
E-mail me at PhantomLordNYC@yahoo.com

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If you are really bored follow me on Twitter

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UFC 143: Nick Diaz Hates the Superbowl and Artificial Sweeteners Feat. Cruelty

Sup gordos? Ya boys have taken time from cutting jalapenos for our Super Bowl salsa to drop some knowledge on your domepieces. We’ve got a so-so card with an EXPLOSIVE main event that’s going to give you more firepower then both QB’s the following day. You want winners like Singletary? We got ’em. I’m Italics, Cruelty isnt, LETS GO.

Stephen Thompson over Daniel Stittgen – TKO Rd 2
When I’m trying to make a pick, I look back and my notes and picks for previous UFC fights. When the guys are new or they’re from a PPV that I was too drunk to write notes about, I go to youtube. Stephen Thompson has a common name but after a little sifting I found the gem: footage of Stephen “Wonderboy” Thompson fighting on Chuck Norris’s World Combat League. Yes. Fuck yes. Well I wasn’t too impressed by his performance. I didn’t see power in his Full Contact Ka-ra-tay, but karate kicks are hot right now so wtf maybe it works. Stittgen is a late replacement and he looks very unpolished. He’s basically a spaz who runs at guys winging punches and if he runs out of space he’ll turn it into shitty takedown. I’m going to bet that the guy from the more professional gym who had a legit training camp will have a big advantage. Thompson doesn’t have killer power but he can probably drop a guy who’s too tired to steady himself. No training camp equals you gas in the second round, so Stittgen gets dropped and he’s too tired to defend on the ground.

Stephen Thompson over Daniel Stittgen – JD
I know slim to nothing on either of these cats, but Thompson trains at Tristar, a pretty legit gym. I’m assuming he can use experience training with superior fighters to steal two of the three rounds.

Rafael Natal over Michael Kuiper – JD
Mel Kiper’s UFC debut is making me excited for the NFL Combine coming up in a few weeks, but his most recent MMA fight was not terribly impressive. Natal hasn’t impressed me either but I like him stylistically here. Natal will be the more patient fighter, who is willing to stand outside and leg kick. Kuiper will try to come forward and he doesn’t defend himself well. If the fight goes to the ground, I don’t believe in Kuiper’s judo based top-control that I dimly remember as “ne waza” from my judo days. Kuiper’s only hope is heavy hands but Natal will stay safe and win a decision.

Rafael Natal over Michael Kuiper – JD
I feel the need to make Rafael Nadal tennis jokes here. But I dont know enough about tennis, so I’ll move on. Kuiper has been tearing shit up on the lower level circuit, wonder if he’s going to be able to give Natal fits. Im assuming no, and locking Kuiper in for “1st time jitters” factor as well. After hearing what Lavar went through before his fight last week I’m beyond convinced in it. Nadal wins two of the three.

Matt Brown over Chris Cope – TKO Rd 1
Cope is a bit of kickboxer, but mostly he just sucks. Now that UFC has a different TV arrangement, I hope they will have more leeway for cutting TUF fighters who don’t deserve to be on the roster. Meanwhile, Matt Brown is just a small step above. He does just BARELY enough to keep his job with the UFC and Joe Silva gives him good matchups. **SPOILER ALERT** JAV describes it perfectly below. I just think even less of Cope than he does.

Matt Brown over Chris Cope – TKO Rd 2
Weird match up for Cope, not sure where he would have an advantage here. Brown is really well rounded and keeps a spot on the roster beating guys like Cope.

Edwin Figueroa over Alex Bruce Leroy – KO Rd 2
Figueroa is a good striker but I think his coaches have seen TV before and he’ll take this fight to the ground. If he can’t make it happen, he’ll be fine in a kickboxing match but I suspect he’ll eventually be able to get on top and throw punches. Leroy is here to bounce around and smile at the camera and cash a check, not get punched while he’s on his back. I’m not saying he’ll tap from strikes but I don’t predict a heroic effort either.

Bruce Leroy over Edwin Figureoa – JD
We all know Leroy cant defend chokes, but i’ve got a feeling Figureoa is going to keep this standing for the most part, and lose 2 of the 3 rounds. If Figueroa takes this down, its a whole different story.

Matt Riddle over Henry Martinez – JD
Christ this undercard sucks. Greg Jackson is Greg Jackson so he gets a phone call when there’s an injury and we get to see one of his random students into this card on short notice. Riddle is still very awkward striking, but he Martinez is not going to have much in the tank. Riddle with some gnp.

Matt Riddle over Henry Martinez – JD
Pulling for my fellow brown skinned bro but his back is really against the wall taking the fight on 2 weeks notice and its your first UFC go ever. Going back to what I was saying earlier, those first time jitters really fuck with your mental state, and Riddle is a solid grappler. Riddle wins via cage control.

Dustin Poirier over Max Holloway – TKO Rd 1
Max is another last minute replacement, and he’s way out of his league. Dustin may be a bit of a headcase, but he is pretty well rounded and fast. Way fast whitey. I expect a flurry of strikes and a finish. I worry about him a little bit, because he’s a serious prospect who seems overwhelmed by the moment sometimes. I’m interested to see how Dustin handles this from a sports psych point of view.

Dustin Poirier over Max Holloway – Sub Rd 1
Blowout fight. Poirier is the real deal and should be getting some run for a #1 contenders fight after this.

Ed Herman over Clifford Starks – TKO Rd 2
Someone who has lots of time on their hands should sit down and figure the Arizona Combat Sports record in the UFC. Clifford Starks is yet another clumsy grappler to come from that camp that apparently specializes in building beach muscle and convincing Joe Silva they can look cool losing on undercards. Ed Herman isn’t fantastic but he’s serviceable and veteran. He’ll outwrestle Starks and put some punches on him. I’m not sure Starks has spent much time on the bottom, and this is his debut, so I’m thinking Ed might get a finish when Starks panicks a little and gets himself in serious trouble from his back.

Ed Herman over Clifford Starks – JD
Never been a fan of Herman’s. Thought he was a little too cocky, boring, and average at best. Much like Brown, he wins fight like these and keeps his job. Poor Starks is undefeated and doesnt even get a picture at Sherdog. Maybe he can catch Herman with some solid strikes? They’re showing Starks no love, neither am I.

Renan Pegado over Scott Jorgensen – TKO Rd 3
Scott Jorgensen has been building a serious resume in the UFC/WEC but this time I think he’s outclassed. Renan Pegado last fought Brad Pickett, who is an alcoholic but still a decent fighter, and Pegado complete ran him over. In my notes I compared him to a great cat and said “awesome” three times. I’m rolling my eyes at my own hype so you must be questioning my sexuality right now. Pegado is for real and this is a fight of the night contender. Jorgensen is used to bullying guys with his wrestling but Barao has an athletic application of bjj that will counter it, IF this fight even goes to the ground.

Renan Pegado over Scott Jorgensen – Sub Rd 2
Here’s the fight everyone should be talking about but aren’t. This has the potential to have balls to the wall action standing and grappling. I’m wondering if Jorgensen is going to be the 135 version of Fitch. Really good, but can’t beat the champion, and just sits around the #1 contender spot for the rest of the year. I think Barao is the real deal tho, and is going to give Jorgensen a shit ton of fits on the mat, and catch him with a choke, giving us a new foe for Cruz.

Josh Koscheck over Mike Pierce – JD
I’ve liked what Pierce has done in the UFC so far. He’s a high workrate wrestler with OK boxing and he forces guys to bring their best game to get the win. After plenty of shuffling on this card, I think Joe Silva is using this fight to push Kos a bit. Pierce should be an inferior version of Kos, so Kos should just shut down his shots and kill him with AKA kickboxing. He started slow against Hughes but I’m thinking he’ll keep his momentum rolling and float back toward the top of this division.

Josh Koscheck over Mike Pierce – JD
This is what happens when you run 30 cards a year. You get Mike Pierce fighting in one of the biggest fights of the night. Kos has earned his spot, no doubt, but Mike Pierce? Does he have exciting KO’s that I missed out on? If he loses, will anyone care? Unless he beats Koscheck, it’s a head scratcher. I dont blame Kos for clowning dude. You go from fighting Matt Hughes, to potentially Condit, to this cat? The only upside for Kos is he gets paid right? Anyway Pierce’s only shot is at turning this into a grappling match, and hoping he’s better on the mat, which he isnt. Kos is going to turn this into a glorified sparring match.

Roy Nelson over Fabricio Werdum – JD
Werdum survived the fight with Overeem by pulling guard or buttscooting whenever he got into trouble. Overeem is a muscled up freak so he eventually gassed and Werdum continued to string the fight out. It was not exactly an impressive effort. Nelson is legit as a grappler and I think he could survive in Werdum’s guard in an MMA world where he’s gi-less and punching. Nelson is a smart fighter, though, and I think he’ll keep this standing. We’d all rather see a grappling match but Nelson is there for a win bonus, not to indulge the fans. Proposition bet: Joe Rogan will mention at least 2 times that Nelson should continue to lose weight and fight at 205.

Roy Nelson over Fabricio Werdum – UD
Two high level grapplers almost always equals weird stand up fight with ugly strikes thrown. HOWEVAH Nelson has some pretty solid stand up, so I think he uses his jab and overhand right to frustrate Werdum. This is going to look very ugly in the 3rd round when both guys have no gas and are throwing weak arm punches. Afterwards Werdum should be like “WHATEVA I SUBMITTED FEDOR BEFORE ANYONE ELSE.”

Nick Diaz over Carlos Condit – TKO Rd 4
As shitty as the rest of this card is, this fight has the potential to make us forget it all. I’ve been skeptical of Condit for a few years. I always felt he was facing inferior talent in WEC, but since he moved to the UFC he has gotten the job done. He found power from technique, and he killed a couple legit fighters in a row. Meanwhile, Diaz redefined what it is to be a volume striker in MMA. For years and years he’s been saying he deserved the spotlight and the money, and here’s his chance to prove it. I don’t see Diaz losing to anybody who isn’t dominant in a single area. He’s faced scarier strikers, and he’s faced scarier grapplers. Condit is impressive because he’s a bit of both but it won’t be enough. Nick’s crazy cardio is the perfect preparation for championship rounds, and more time means more accumulation of damage. By the fourth round, the fight will be close but Condit will be marked up and slowing down. Nick won’t let up, I don’t think Carlos will make it out for the beginning of the fifth.

Nick Diaz over Carlos Condit – Sub Rd 3
This shit is going to be dynamite. I’m once again torn on picking Diaz, because the one guy who I think can beat him will be standing in front of him. Condit is a fucking animal, I’ve been saying this for YEARS now. He’s really come into his own and EITHER of these guys gives GSP the bizznazz when they do eventually meet IMO. Condit is a great finisher and if he drops Diaz could get one of those flurry finishes. But we are talking about Nick fucking Diaz here. I need to mention that I’ve enjoyed Nick being able to halfass adapt to doing interviews. His rambling on with Ariel is some entertaining shit. At one point during the interview, Nick talked about his childhood, moving in with his brother, lack of sparring partners, and not having a photo I.D. And all Ariel asked him was “How was your flight?”

So I dont see either guy shooting unless they are in trouble, but I’m thinking Condit will later in the fight out of exaustion/desperation and that’s when Diaz locks in the choke after a great back and fourth throw down. When the Diaz Bros both have belts its really going to piss off the internet.

SUPERBOWL BONUS PICKS FOR EXTRA GAMBLING FUN:

New York Giants over New England Patriots – 35-30
The Giants will struggle to run at first, but when they switch to exclusively spread concepts and no huddle then the shootout will begin. The Patriots will create a few turnovers but the Giants will move the ball through the air. The Patriots offense is scary but Giants will make Brady a little uncomfortable and that will be the difference. Eli isn’t as good as Peyton, so don’t get that twisted, but he’s got a good supporting cast and he’s hot right now.

New York Giants over New England Patriots – 27-17
Brady will look bad because of that front 7, Gronk will be less Gronklike due to injuries, Eli becomes elite, and a hero to all NYG football fans. Who’s gonna stop those WR’s, Edleman? Also, take whatever the over is on “Times Payton is shown on television during the game” even if its at 100.

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We Are… a Sad State

OLD SCHOOL



When the Penn State child sex scandal broke several months ago, I was very outspoken about the role of the university administration in the investigation. I guess the lack of role would be more appropriate, as further research revealed a complete disconnect in accountability all the way from assistant coach Mike McCreary up to the university president. Paterno leaves behind a family, friends, and thousands of supporters who mourn his death. He is without a doubt one of the most popular figures in the history of football, and is regarded as an institution in State College.

The question seems to be whether or not the firing of Paterno, and the unceremonious way that the winningest coach in college football history left State College will tarnish his “legacy”. Does one single black mark on an illustrious career negate 409 wins and over half a century of service to a university and its surrounding community?

When the one black mark involves the systematic cover up of child rape, the answer is an unequivocal yes.

It’s a controversial position, especially in Western PA where I live. “JoePa” is regarded as an almost mythical figure, and there will be a line for several miles at his memorial filled with people who have been touched (figuratively, of course) by the coach. To condemn him is to raise the ire of thousands of Penn State supporters – many of whom regard a PSU home game as a religious experience.

Maybe that is the problem: When a football program is elevated to that level of importance, it could cloud what is right and what is wrong. Paterno is a hero to many, so to even hint that he did something wrong is near blasphemy in Pennsylvania.

To the countless players, students, and families that benefited from an association with Paterno, I would expect nothing short of your undying support for his legend. My contention is that none of that matters to the families of the children who were victimized by Jerry Sandusky. None of that changes right from wrong.

And here is where it gets dicey: By Paterno’s own testimony, he was aware of the allegations brought forward by Mike McCreary in 2002. Jerry Sandusky was still permitted on school grounds, to interact with children, and even had access to the practice facility. By his own admission after his firing, Paterno “wished he would have done more” to protect the innocent children who were raped on his watch.

Harsh on the coach? Absolutely. Joe Paterno was bigger than the university, so the claim that he took the charges to the administration is laughable at best, and a blatant cover-up at worst. Paterno, like the rest of the staff who were made aware of the scandal, put the football program ahead of doing the right thing. Football was put in front of protecting children. Football was put in front of telling the truth. Football was put in front of what you or I would consider a moral obligation.

You don’t believe that Paterno was above the law at State College? The university did everything that they could to fire him back in 2004, and the backlash was so great that they had to acquiesce, and back off – basically letting the coach decide when to ride off into the sunset.

It’s a shame that 46 years of being a great coach is wiped out by one bad decision. Paterno could have done more – like not letting Jerry Sandusky within a mile of a Penn State facility from the SECOND that he heard about a young boy being sodomized in his locker room. He didn’t – and you can say what you want about Paterno as a coach, but I will not weep for his legacy in the wake of such an unforgivable lapse in judgment. I posed the question months ago: If it was YOUR child who was being raped, would you be satisfied with the way Paterno handled things? If it was Paterno’s OWN child being molested, do you think he would have responded the same way?

Consider this: You are in charge of a company, and one of your employees comes to you with allegations of sexual misconduct – how would you handle it? It doesn’t matter if you are managing a Burger King, or are the Executive Vice President of Apple – right is right. Even Paterno’s most staunch supporters can’t say that they think he handled things well.

To me (and I’m sure to the families of the children who had their lives destroyed by this) the “good” that Paterno did does not absolve him from being accountable. Jerry Sandusky was involved in charitable work for decades, and for some reason nobody seems to care about all of the “good” that he did. You know why? Because raping children cancels out just about any positive out there. MOST people lead generally good lives. If you kill ONE person, all of the sudden none of that matters in the eyes of the public. In prison, inmates who are locked up for crimes against children are regarded as the lowest possible rung on the totem pole. To put it in simple terms, even convicted murders look at a pedophile and regard them as worse.

Paterno and his staff picked his legacy, and protecting the reputation of a football program over protecting children.

I agree with you Joe. I wish you would have done more too. You know who else wishes you did more? Every single victim of Jerry Sandusky that happened after you were made aware of the situation.



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UFC 142 – Anthony Johnson Could’nt Stop Eating Tho Feat. Cruelty

Sup folks. Busy day that has included a trip to Wing Stop for mad beer and wings, but yet I’m still here, posting once again for you fucks. Cruelty is as well. You should follow him on Twitter. If I could remember his handle I’d include it. Just check my recent followers, clown ass. We got fights in between Tebow awesomeness, Brazil always has kick ass fans, let’s stop fucking around, I’m italics, Cruelty isnt, LETS GO.

Antonio Carvalho over Felipe Arantes – Round 2 TKO
Antonio was a prospect back in the day when he was fighting in Shooto and no American orgs had smaller weight classes. I think he was even top 5 at one point? He’s a smooth striker who throws clean crisp combos. He’s also a smart fighter and student of the game, but is a little on the chinny side and can spend too much time on the bottom. Felipe is not anything special as far as I can tell. I saw him fight a few years ago at a small event and was much more impressed with his opponent who won that fight. He put together some wins over randoms but I’m still sorta surprised he’s in the UFC again. Cheap local talent? I think Antonio should outclass him with superior kickboxing and put him away in the second.

Felipe Arantes over Felipe Arantes – JD
Two Brazilians to open the card? Makes sense. Neither guy has big wins over quality names on their record, and I’m kind of leaning slugfest. Arantes has a cowboy hat on in his Sherdog pic, making it impossible for me to pick against him. Brazilian Cowboy? WHHHAAAT? Totally buying this gimmick.

Rousimar “Toquino” Palhares over Mike Massenzio – Round 3 JD
Massenzio is high workrate, he’s tough, and he’s a decent wrestler who can brawl a little bit. Toquino is psychopath but he’s also a far superior grappler, and probably even in the striking department. Not a good matchup for Massenzio, but at least Mike showed decent sub defense so he should make it to the judges here.

Toquino Palhares over Mike Massenzio – Sub Rd 1
Who did Palhares piss off to get this low on the card? This dude’s still a borderline stud! Massenzio probably trained some heel hook defense, but not enough. Palhares will rip it clean because all Brazilians hate Americans thanks to Frank Mir.

Gabriel Gonzaga over Edinaldo Oliveira – Round 1 Submission (Arm Triangle)
Gonzaga sorta fell apart over the years. Or maybe he had a couple wins that made him look better than he really ever was? Well he’s fighting a crappy fighter so he should look decent in this one at least. Oliveira is small, wild, and not much of a grappler. Gonzaga hasn’t looked like an ADCC champion, but he might on Saturday. Easy takedown and submission.

Edinaldo Oliveira over Gabriel Gonzaga – TKO Rd 1
Didn’t Gonzaga retire or some shit? I’ve heard a ton of positive shit about Oliveira, and I’m buying into it. Gonzaga’s chin is glassy. Should we be preparing for a wave of HW’s from Brazil in the next few years?

Michihiro Omigawa over Yuri Alcantara – Round 3 JD
Yuri has a sweet win over Felipe Arantes who, if you recall, I talked shit about earlier. Alcantara is wild as a striker and grappler, and actually Omigawa might brawl with him. This could be fun for a few minutes but eventually Omigawa will get a takedown with his judo, and he’ll grind out a decision.

Michihiro Omigawa over Yuri Alcantara – UD
Dammit Omigawa has a mad weird record and this could be a spot where he randomly KO’s this cat. Yuri has a pretty crazy record so this could come down to a pick ‘em fight. Leaning Omigawa cause I still got love for JMMA, and I’ve been day drinking.

Carlo Prater over Erick Silva – Round 1 Submission (RNC)
Prater has been one win away from a UFC invitation for years. He’ll win a few, people will talk about him, then he’ll lose to a UFC reject (for example) and falls down a rung on the ladder. Happily for him, his UFC debut is against a guy who probably doesn’t belong at all. Erick Silva had a quick win in the previous UFC Brazil, but he is a bit too wild to survive for long. Prater will take him down and tap him.

Erick Silva over Carlo Prater – TKO Rd 1
Two points here. 1. Prater is one of these “Can’t ever beat really good guys but gives good guys fits and sometimes wins” cats. 2. Silva is ANOTHER “We better watch this dude, beat some solid guys, and trains with a top team” Brazilian. I think this will be Silva’s coming out party, highlight KO style.

Edson Barboza over Terry Etim – Round 3 JD
We last saw Barboza face another British striker, Ross Pearson in the last UFC Brazil, and I think the rabid crowd and white skin showing damage may have won him that decision. That said, he fought a great fight and don’t get it twisted here… he is a scary dude. Etim uses his length well as a striker, and he tempts people into grappling where he is surprisingly dangerous. Barboza won’t try to wrestle, though, and I think we’ll see another blood and guts standup fight with the Brazilian coming out on top.

Edson Barboza over Terry Etim – JD
Very interesting match up. Both are high level strikers, but the YO YOU DEALING WITH THE XFACTOR could be Etim’s very sneaky ground game/ effective lankyness. I think Barboza will feed off the crowd and throw a bunch of silly kicks that glance off Etim but are enough to win a close fight. Etim should REALLY consider testing Barboza’s ground game.

Thiago Tavares over Sam Stout – Round 3 JD
Tavares will sometimes scrap, but Sam Stout is pretty much a pure striker, and I can’t believe Tavares would be so stupid as to gameplan for kickboxing. Tavares will look for takedowns off punches, just like he did against Spencer Fisher. Tavares doesn’t have great wrestling, but judges will sometimes call the struggle for a single-leg “aggression.” When he does get the takedown, Tavares has great positional bjj and he’ll put Stout in danger right away. Stout is better from the bottom than Fisher, so he’ll survive the full 15 minutes.

Thiago Tavares over Sam Stout – JD
Always been a fan of Tavares style, he fights his ass off every fight, and I’m wondering if Stout’s southpaw style will give him fits. Again, I’m leaning towards all these Brazilians Hulking Up and using the crowd to help push them over with the crowd as well as the judges. Tavares does just enough to steal 2 of the 3 rounds.

Ricardo Funch over Mike Pyle – Round 3 JD
Pyle is a veteran who is going to act as a gatekeeper for mediocre grapplers with gay long hair. Funch has terrible wrestling technique, and terrible stand up. Pyle will actually be the superior striker in this fight, which is a sad statement. Pyle made his living by tapping out wrestlers, but Funch is bjj first, and Pyle won’t catch him. Funch will try for takedowns, and Pyle will strike. Eventually Pyle will spend some time on top and pile up points. Fuck that was an accidental pun I swear. I desperately want to delete it, but I’m leaving it in as penance. I deserve your ridicule for that sentence.

Mike Pyle over Ricardo Funch – JD
Seriously tho, this fight, this high on the card? It’s pretty terrible. Pyle is going to grapplefuck Funch for three rounds, the Brazilians are gonna get super pissed, and chant terrible things at Pyle. Hopefully Mir will be in the building and the Brazilians aim all chants at him. If I was Brazilian I’d be upset that this wasn’t lower on the card.

Anthony Johnson over Vitor Belfort – Round 1 KO
I see that Rumble missed weight by 12 pounds. Twelve pounds isn’t like “I’m so dehydrated I can’t cut the extra few”, it’s like “I can’t do it, so I’m not even going to try.” All anyone talks about with this guy is how he cuts down too far, and apparently moving up to 185 didn’t help him. His manager and trainers should be catching shit for this, just as much as he is. Those guys are responsible for getting him in the cage with all of the bureaucratic shit out of the way. Weigh-ins are a bit beyond filling out paperwork, but it’s still non-fight shit and someone should be in charge of making him have his shit together. A little research tells me that the co-fuckups are Rashad Evans and Mike Van Arsadale. Didn’t MVD go to the Olympic training center? These are guys who should know about weight cuts. There’s a story here that we don’t know. Allow me to float a theory: The last charismatic fighter who habitually missed weight is now staring in a Steven Soderbergh movie. (Note: I’m not talking about Sasha Grey.) Joe Rogan believes the moon landing was staged… what will he say about the conspiracy behind UFC 142: Too Much Dark Meat. Ok so the fight should be fun. There should be a bunch of hands flying, and Belfort falling. Rumble can win this fight with wrestling too, but he won’t need to. Quick knockout, and then he can work on convincing Zuffa not to fire him. The local crowd is going to be PISSED at Rumble so hopefully he doesn’t get knifed on the way to the airport.

Anthony Johnson over Vitor Belfort – Round 1 TKO
You all know how I feel about not making weight. Rumble should be fired regardless of the outcome of this fight. That being said he’s going to take Belfort down, and pound him out pretty easily. Belfort has done a good job beating guys that stand right in front of him and let him launch bombs, Rumble isn’t doing that. Belfort still has the Wandy fight, he’ll be ok. As far as Rumble, here’s a perfect opportunity for Dana to use the “Demote” cause here and send Rumble to StrikeForce, with the other alternative being the door.

Jose Aldo over Chad Mendes – Round 5 JD
I think some people expected Aldo to tear up Kenny Florian, and instead he looked human. He probably lost the first two rounds, but he impressed me in the last three. He didn’t gas, he showed decent takedowns, and he looked heavy when he was on top. Chad Mendes is going to try to wrestle Aldo, because Jose is at a much higher level in the standup department. I think Mendes is going to be a little surprised at how hard he has to work for a takedown. On the ground, Mendes is going to be in danger and when he’s been threatened in previous fights he’s had a tendency to stand up out of the guard. That won’t work this time because Jose will just stand up and put more damage on him. Leg kicks and short combos will wear Chad down and his shots will start to suck. Mendes will have better cardio but he’ll be hurt by the Championship Rounds and that will slow him down. This appears to be a decent style match-up for Jose, despite the equality in skill level.

Jose Aldo over Chad Mendes – TKO Rd 1
Actually torn on this fight. Wondering if Chad can put Aldo on his back for 3 of the 5 rounds. If he can get takedowns early and quiet the crowd this could get VERY interesting. Don’t see it happening tho, or at least don’t have the confidence in Mendes to do so. I think Mendes will be a BIIIITTT too flatfooted, and Aldo goes old skool Aldo and throttles Mendes with strikes, mostly knees. Team Alpha Male better hurry up and get on finding another 145er for Aldo to beat up.

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UFC 141 – Totally Legal And Steroid Free Feat. Cruelty WITH END OF THE YEAR AWARDS!!!

Sup scumbags, ya boys are back. On a Friday? You know shit’s about to get weird. So it’s NYE Weekend, and although Cruelty and I miss Pride FC wars with Zulu, Akebono, MINOWAMAN, and Tank Abbott, we’ll take what we can get. As always, I’m ITALICS, he aint, LETS GOOOOOO.

Diego Nunes over Manny Gamburyan – TKO Rd 1
Manny tends to get hit a little way too much for my liking because he’s on some “I’m tough cause I’m Armenian” shit. I’ve met a few nuts like this. It never ended well for them, and it won’t end well for Manny either. Diego has some solid stand up and I’m assuming learned to pace himself after the K-Flo fight. Diego will 2-piece him.

Manny Gamburyan over Diego Nunes – Round 3 JD
Nunes looked good against Kenny Florian, but only for a round. He has talent but his cardio is shit and I think Manny will force him to work. Maybe he trained his cardio between fights but that’s not part of the Brazilian culture, so I doubt it. Brazilian has a rich multi-ethnic heritage, but only the Japanese part is hard-working and anyway how great have the Japanese fared in the UFC? Let’s read from wiki: “This diverse cultural background has helped boast many celebrations and festivals that have become known around the world.” See? That doesn’t say a fucking thing about getting up early to go running. Nunes will pick Manny apart for the first round, and struggle through the next two. Manny will try for takedowns and wing punches for 15 minutes, and thus Manny wins by being more aggressive.

Matt Riddle over Luis Ramos – JD
I’m wondering when we bail on “Riddle is still young and learning” and go with “Dude that got a bunch of fights in the UFC because of TUF”. Ramos has a ton of unimpressive W’s and a KO loss in his only UFC appearance? I’m taking Riddle to grind out a JD.

Matt Riddle over Luis Ramos – Round 3 JD
Is the Riddler going to be in the next Batman? Will Matt Riddle wear shorts with question marks like that guy who writes books about getting government money for your bullshit small business? I actually met that guy, Matthew Lesko, when I was working at a restaurant in DC. He was wearing his question-mark suit and people were staring at him. He was loving the attention so I totally no-sold his bullshit, just to spite him. It was probably the most professionally I ever treated a customer at that job. Anyway, Matt Riddle is a mediocre wrestler and very awkward striker. I haven’t seen much of Luis Ramos, except that he looks a bit like a guy in the documentary “Waste Land.” That is an excellent, excellent movie for those of you who are willing to read subtitles AND watch a documentary. I think that movie is worth the trouble but I suspect our readership here prefers torture porn to inspirational stories about art and the human spirit. Meanwhile, my prediction for his last fight was totally right-on, so I will now quote myself: “Ramos stands up straight and slides around without moving his head, so I think he gets blasted.” That fight lasted 40 seconds. Well Riddle can’t box for shit so he’s not in as much danger. Riddle will take him down, and Ramos is Nova Uniao so he might have good jits. I’ll still pick Ramos to lose a decision, but I’ll be rooting for him to hit a quick sub so we can move on to a fight that matters.

Jacob Volkmann over Efrain Escudero – TKO Rd 2
Is Escudero the worst TUF champion of all time? Probably not statistically, but I cant think of a TUF champ that is this irrelevant. The kid finally breaks back into the UFC and he gets fucking Volkmann? Perhaps this should be the new way to treat TUF champs. Fuck building them up, let’s put them in there with beasts already. Volkmann’s going to use his wrestling advantage to give Efrain fits and finish with G & P later in the fight.

Jacob Volkmann over Efrain Escudero – Round 3 JD
Efrain looked good enough on TUF that I actually thought he had a bright future. So far he has been a disappointment. If we met in person, I would give him the slow headshake with a slight frown and he’d be like “Leave me alone bro.” Volkmann is awkward but his wrestling is effective and Efrain is not scary enough to threaten him. Volkmann with a little gnp and the win. Wow, this card is not looking very fun so far.

Sean Pierson over Dong Hyun Kim – TKO Rd 1
I’m wondering two things here. 1. Did Condit expose Stun Gun for having a bad chin? 2. Can Pierson use his great stand up to KO Stun Gun? I’m thinking yes, and yes. Pierson catches Stun Gun early after some failed take down attempts and drops him, then finishes with strikes on the ground. We will then sit back and try and figure out why it took guys so long to do this to Stun Gun in the first place.

Dong Hyun Kim over Sean Pierson – Round 3 JD
Pierson showed some good boxing in previous UFC bouts, but got caught in his last fight with Ellenberger. Kim is strong but he doesn’t have KO power as far as we’ve seen. Pierson will probably want to use his boxing advantage and Kim will want to clinch. Kim has dealt with good boxers before, and coming off a brutal TKO loss I think he’ll be conservative. Kim will clinch, hit a trip, and win with gnp.

Danny Castillo over Anthony Njokuani – JD
We should probably start keeping an eye on Castillo. Dude’s got great wrestling, works with a great team, and once he gets some solid stand up game, is gonna be scary. Njokuani is a guy that is exciting as hell to watch when someones willing to stand with him. That wont be Castillo, who’s going to swarm him and pressure him with grappling early. 3 rounds worth of takedowns coming up!

Danny Castillo over Anthony Njokuani – Round 2 TKO
This is classic grappler vs striker with two action fighters, and I’m hoping the pace will wake us all up after a string of very slow fights. Castillo trains with Team Alpha Male, but I don’t hate him like I hate the other guys. He has a great double, and throws serious volume from top position. Njokuani will try to use his kicks to keep distance, and sprawl when he can’t. I think Castillo will be able to spend most of this fight on top, and eventually Njokuani will get himself in trouble trying to get up. Castillo will get a dominant position in a scramble, and pound Njo out.

Ross Pearson over Junior Assuncao – JD
As bulky as Pearson is, he’s fighting at 145? Holy shit. Assuncao isn’t taking him down, and his stand up wont match up with Ross’ slick boxing. Pearson beats on Junior for 3 rounds.

Ross Pearson over Junior Assuncao – Round 3 TKO
Junior has a pretty good top game but his takedowns aren’t great. Pearson has excellent boxing and his takedown defense is good, and getting better fight by fight. I think we’ll see that Pearson is the more advanced fighter, though both have great tools. Pearson will pile up damage with boxing between stuffing takedown attempts. Eventually Assuncao will slow down and Pearson will work for the finish.

Nam Phan over Jim Hettes – TKO Rd 2
See this is how TUF guys build those records up. This should be an easy fight for Nam. Hettes is crazy inexperienced, will be dumb enough to trade with Nam, and Nam is going to break him down with body work and peppering punches.

Nam Phan over Jim Hettes – Round 3 JD
The experience deficit between these fighters is extreme. Phan has been in wars for 10 years, and Hettes has only been in 8 quick wins in small shows before one competitive fight against Bruce Leroy. Phan is not fantastic, but he is not going to get tapped in 2 minutes like the randoms Hettes beat in Northeast regional shows. Phan has great body shots that will overwhelm and demoralize Hettes. By the second round, Hettes will be desperate and things will get worse. Big third round by Phan and an easy decision.

Alexander Gustafsson over Vladimir Matyushenko – KO Rd 1
Initially I was taking Vlad via TKO, I don’t think Alex’s chin has been tested yet, but Vlad’s take down defense is terrible and Gustafsson was smart enough to take all previous decent strikers down and submit them, so I assume he’s going to do the same here. Janitor should consider training fighters from here on out if he loses this one.

Alexander Gustafsson over Vladimir Matyushenko – Round 2 TKO
Gustafsson has faced some decent opponents but how will he deal with someone UNDEFEATED IN THE IFL?? I love Vladdy but Gustafsson is a very promising fighter who should pick him apart. Gustafsson will use length and athleticism to outstrike and damage Vladdy. I was disappointed by Gustafsson’s low workrate in his fight with Hamill, but I think he’ll turn up the volume against this tougher opponent. This is an appropriate test to see if Gustafsson is going to continue as a prospect or stall out.

Johny Hendricks over Jon Fitch – KO Rd 1
Yes, my official “JAV DONE LOST IT” pick of the day. Here me out tho. Fitch is coming off a huge layover, and has only fought 3 times in the last two years. Ring rust will play a factor in this fight. Hendricks is a REALLY good wrestler, and I believe can stuff Fitch’s take down game, and force this into a stand up fight. This is where Hendricks will unleash that big right hand and put Fitch to sleep. I swear this isn’t me talking myself into this pick because Fitch is boring. SWEAR.

Jon Fitch over Johny Hendricks – Round 3 JD
Hendricks has risen to the level in the Welterweight division where it is his honor to lose to either Thiggy Alves or Jon Fitch. For whatever reason, he drew Fitch. What that means is that his loss will be a tough clinchfest, rather than a three rounds of leg kicks. Fitch’s grappling will really be tested, and Hendricks could always land a big punch because he has power that Fitch does not. The wildcard will be Fitch’s submissions, which could come in a scramble when Hendricks is in 100% wrestling mode. I’m picking Fitch to win a close and debated decision by scoring a couple brief takedowns, and winning the dirty boxing.

Donald Cerrone over Nate Diaz – JD
Egads am I really picking someone to beat Nate? I cant remember the last time I did this, if ever. Unlike everyone else, I’ve been a believer in Cerrone for a few years now. He always brought it in the WEC and I knew once he figured out the ground game would be a beast. Nate isn’t going to have a chance to use his BJJ, it’s going to be a stand up fight, and Nate’s gonna be getting clipped with kicks and straight punches all night. This has the blueprint for a war, and I think it becomes one rather quickly. Afterwards, Nick will call out Cerrone, and fight Condit and Cowboy in the same night.

Donald “Cowboy” Cerrone over Nate Diaz – Round 3 JD
I’ve become a Cowboy Cerrone believer. His muay Thai is brutal, and I like it over Nate’s boxing. Cowboy is gonna force Nate into a long kickboxing match and Nate is gonna get battered in a way that is pretty rare for him. Nate found his power recently and I think he’ll hurt Cowboy a bit too, but Cerrone edges out the fight. Leg kicks over jabs in the scoring? This time at least

Alistair Overeem over Brock Lesnar – Round 2 KO
These guys are scary, but they are also flawed. That’s how it goes in the HW division it seems. Both guys could potentially have cardio problems, both guys struggle to handle damage, and both guys are coming off personal problems. I wonder who was able to have a smoother training camp. With all of that nonsense, I feel damn confident this isn’t going 5 rounds. Either guy could land a big shot and it would be over. I was extremely unimpressed by his fight vs Werdum, but I’m still picking Overeem in the end because I believe a bit more in his accuracy. Both guys will likely be tentative, and in the brief exchanges I think it’s more likely Overeem will land. Brock will try for takedowns without really setting them up, and that will leave him briefly vulnerable each time. Alistair lands a big one as Brock tries to reset off a stalled shot.

Brock Lesnar over Alistair Overeem – TKO Rd 2
Goddamn I am so torn on this fight. I know I say that every card, credit to the UFC for making tough match ups. We finally get Reem, the haters can pipe down because he’s passed his tests, (For now at least) and they throw his ass right into the fire with Lesnar. This is pretty easy to break down. Lesnar is the best HW wrestler/grappler in the world (Suck on that Barnett fans) who doesn’t know how to take a punch. Overeem is the greatest HW striker in the world, but his grappling is suspect. And it has been for 10 years. Now he’s going to take on the best grappler in the world? This fight should go one of two ways. Either Reem knocks Brock out and looks dominant, or Lesnar grapplefucks the shit outta Reem and looks dominant. AS I’M TYPING THIS I AM LITERALLY CHANGING MY MIND FOR THE 79347546769 TIME. But I’m leaning Brock to bull rush Reem, grab a double leg, and pound out Reem and wear him and those big muscles out. Come the second round, Reem will be done, and Brock will smash him the way he did Mir. It’s gonna be brutal. Sherdog will explode. I will laugh.

END OF THE YEAR AWARDS:

Fight Of The Year: Shogun-Henderson
This may be the greatest fight I’ve ever seen. No bullshit. Two fantastic fighters beating the absolute crap out of each other for 5 rounds, and at the end most scored it a draw. It was like Rocky I but for real. As great as it was, these two should never fight each other again, because fights like that take time off of your career, and LIFE SPAN.

Fight of the Year: Edgar – Maynard II
This was Hollywood drama played out for real. I’m an Edgar fan, and this fight further solidified it. Coming back after getting dropped over and over was nothing short of heroic.

Fighter Of The Year – Jon Jones
You finish Bader, Shogun, Rampage, and Machida in the same year? This is just as good of a run Shogun had a few years back when he won the GP and we were all crowning his ass. And the real scary thing? He’s only just begun.

Fighter of the Year: Dan Henderson
I’m going against the Jon Jones grain here, and it’s not entirely due to my desire to be contrary. Henderson had wins over some very big names in the sport, and he was responsible for some of the best fights. His punching power was on serious display as was his heart. He’s an old man in this sport but in 2011, but my opinion of him went from “Wow ok, I guess he’s still relevant” to “This guy may be one of the best of all time.”

Round of the Year: Diaz – Daley 1st and only Round
I think Nick Diaz is now my favorite fighter to watch. I always loved him as a personality but his nasty body shots and cardio-as-a-weapon was perfected in 2011, and this round was a great example of it. Daley has power and hurt Diaz a few times here to make it even more fun to watch.

Round Of The Year: Chandler – Alvarez Rd 1
Just when you think UFC will dominate all of our awards BOOM BACK TO BACK NON UFC EVENTS. SUCK ON THAT MMA AWARDS. With this fight you could probably pick any round, but the 1st was a fucking barnburner Frye/Takayama level violence. Both guys getting floored, both guys throwing bombs, it was like a fucking video game.

Style/Technique of the Year: Kara-tay KICK
In previous years we have talked about the rise of certain weightclasses, or the rise of certain camps. This year I think the rise of Karate kicking technique in MMA deserves a mention. For a long time we MMA fans have mocked “McDojos” and katas and all of that bullshit, but last year we saw Steven FUCKING Segal in the corner of an MMA champion. ASilva and Machida each had shocking facekick knockouts in the first quarter of the year, and this is a copycat sport so it wasn’t long before we saw fights start to look a little more like kung-fu movies. We saw people start to use the sidekick as a jab, we saw people start using this semi-legal sidekick to the knee, and we saw the return of the frontkick as a viable finishing weapon. Anderson Silva, Georges St. Pierre, and Jon Jones are all top 5 pound for pound fighters and they all use these types of techniques as a major component of their offense. For last year at least, the most effective modern fighters used some of the oldest techniques.

Technique Of The Year: H-Bomb
Can you remember the last time a guy was so predictable, but yet nobody could stop it? EVERYONE knows you avoid the Henderson right hand, and yet nobody could do it. NOBODY. Jones beats you with a toolbox worth of crazy shit, Hendo beats you with one thing, the H-Bomb.

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The Lethal Entertainment Women Of Rasslin Tournament Wrestlers & Valets Rd. 3

Christmas is almost upon us so what better way to celebrate then to decide what chick is hotter then the other. So far the tournament has had plenty of predictable results and some shocking upsets. But we’re getting into the home stretch now.

Christy Hemme defeats So Cal Val 80% to 20%

Traci defeats Terri 55.56% to 44.44%

Aksana defeats Ashley 66.67% to 33.33%

Francine defeats Ryan Shamrock 77.78% to 22.22%

Kimberly Page defeats Jackie Gayda 88.89% to 11.11%

Dawn Marie defeats Midajah 88.89% to 11.11%

Maria defeated Gorgeous George 88.89% to 11.11%

Stacy defeated Rosa 88.89% to 11.11%

These results are where I figured they would be, so I’m not complaining.

Wrestler’s Round Three

Trish VS. Tara

Trish Stratus Vs. Tara (Victoria)

Melina VS. Molly Holly

Melina Perez Vs. Molly Holly

Lita VS. Maryse

Lita Vs. Maryse

Brooke Adams VS. AJ Lee

Brooke Adams Vs. AJ Lee

Valets Round Three

Christy Hemme VS. Traci Brooks

Christy Hemme Vs. Traci Brooks

Aksana VS. Francine

Aksana Vs. Francine

Kimberly VS. Dawn Marie

Kimberly Page Vs. Dawn Marie

Maria VS. Stacy Keibler

Maria Vs. Stacy Keibler

All polls close on December 28th, 2011 around Midnight on the West Coast.

COMMENT as you see fit.
E-mail me at PhantomLordNYC@yahoo.com

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