Sup putofaces, your boys have taken a break from being awesome and shit to hit you with that picks post. Now most of us would ASSUME that 150 would be a big deal, but it isnt. Rather then get on my soapbox and get all “OVERSATURATION OF THE SPORT” I’ll just kick you some of my supreme knowledge, with the great Cruelty, as always. I’m italics, he aint. LETS GO!!
Two things off the bat, mouthbreathers.
1) Oh now we’re back to being LETHAL WRESTLING AGAIN?!? Well okay…wrestling fans listen to shitty music so this belongs here. Most of the readers here are in their 30’s and were a part of the least fun decade ever. (We in the 90’s didn’t have fun things like Woodstock, MTV when it ran music, or 9/11.) So it belongs here and fuck you.
2) I was going to put a “Part 1” in the title there…but a cursory Google search of Lethal’s archive will tell you that when this happens, there’s never a “Part 2.”
I have a feeling there will be many parts to this series, however. For one, I just recovered roughly 400 compact discs that were hidden in a closet…which is apt, as most of these CDs are from the 90s. Unlike gay people, however, these CDs probably should have just stayed in the fucking closet.
Posted in Features, Music, Pop Culture, stupid
Tagged 90's, A Perfect Circle, Beck, Big Black, CD, Compact Discs, Danzig, David Geffen, Galactic Cowboys, hidden tracks, Kyuss, Led Zeppelin, Ministry, Music, music history, Nirvana, Queens of the Stone Age, Scientology, Smashing Pumpkins, Supersuckers, the Who, Tool, Type O Negative, White Zombie
A long time ago, on an internet far, far away, wrestling used to be cool. And watching wrestling was even cooler. Writing about wrestling? EVEN COOLER STILL.
Today, fresh off of watching a complete episode of RAW for the first time in 5+ years (1000 episodes and what not), I return to the haven of the depraved know as lethalwrestling and present for the enjoyment of approximately 4-6 people this very special edition of “What’s Going On?”
In this picture, Vince McMahon:
A. Points to Degeneration X making their grand entrance
B. Would like this dance
C. DOES WHATEVER HE DAMN WELL WANTS TO DAMN DO HE’S VINCE MCMAHON DAMMIT
Posted in Sports
Sup folks, we’re back and giving you the old skool WRITTEN MATERIAL, because sometimes you deserve a podcast, sometimes you dont. We got a fun card, wiith a whacky main event, so rather then bitch about the lack of star power, and the fact that we just had the biggest PPV of the year TWO WEEKS AGO, LETS GO!! I’m italics, Cruelty isnt, do I still gotta explain that folks?
Anton Kuivanen over Mitch Clarke – Round 3 JD
Mitch Clarke is a generic working class wrestler and not UFC quality. Anton doesn’t look to have great takedown defense, and I know he has more submissions than KOs, but I think so poorly of Mitch that I figure Anton wins via sprawl n brawl. Anton moves OK and likes to let his hands go a little bit.
Holy shit could it be even more content on the main page? Yes it seems for some reason we’ve upped our workrate around here so I figured I might as well contribute. Yes I know the Lethal women of rasslin tournament fizzled (but come on it’s women’s wrestling…so who cares anyway). But despite being burned out on wrestling in general, I had to write something because behind the scenes the WWE with Vince McMahon at the helm might be driving their ship straight into an iceberg.
What iceberg could be so big that it could sink the WWE you ask?
The WWE Network; That’s what. We haven’t heard much about the WWE Network lately and well there’s a good reason for that. The little news there is not too good.
Posted in Misc., Sports, TV
One of my great life passions is professional wrestling. I have been lucky enough to live that passion for almost 14 years off and on and it has taken me across the country and given me the opportunity to meet and learn from some of the best workers in the business.
People often ask me how I got involved in professional wrestling. Like pretty much everything else in my life, I certainly did not take the traditional path. It started in around 1996. I was in high school and like a lot of people I had become enthralled with the WWF and the “Attitude” era of professional wrestling. I guess it really was the end of professional wrestling and the dawn of “sports entertainment” – but it was captivating programming for sure. I had always been a wrestling fan. I remember the day I stumbled upon the NWA during one of the “Clash of the Champions” broadcasts. It ended up being the legendary Flair/Sting matchup that smart marks still get erections for, so I got lucky and caught a good show.
The way Chael Sonnen has been cranking out sound bites, it only makes sense that we’d do this one audio style. In the link below you’ll find about an hour of MMA preview goodness, plus some of the usual nonsense banter you’ve come to know and love from us. All of this for free? Quote the Saturn “You’re welcome”
That Other Sports Show – UFC 148 Preview feat. Cruelty
featuring guest writer: SPIFFY!
I know Disco used to do some fresh news items to open these things, but fuck that. I’m the main
event. I don’t need filler to get me over with the boys.
The show opens with a Fourth of July barbecue. Hornswaggle has some divas help him get wet. I
bet that’s the closest he ever came. Not like me. You know Lita told me my cock tasted like
Morgan’s herpes? I wonder how she knew? That skank sure got around. Teddy Long parades Eve and
her five head around in a maid outfit. Are we supposed to call French Maids ‘freedom maids’ now?
USA! USA! USA! Santino shows off his superior comedy skills by not being able to light a
barbecue. I don’t know why you guys are so hard on him. He was a real good worker in the
indies. His workrate was Benoit level! My good pal Glen Jacobs comes out and lights the
barbecue with a wave of his hand. I taught him that trick in Atlanta!
OLD SKOOL LINE BREAK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111111111111111
(*Looks around, wincing, sipping…then chugging a can of Busch Light. Throws it on the floor.*)
That’s all you gots to say about this.
Don’t let the new color scheme here at Lethal Entertainment fool you. We’re more than just pretty bimbos. We used to be a wrestling website, for fuck sakes. That started back when wrestling was wrestling. When wrestling became “sports entertainment,” we made a desperate grab to shed our skin, like a slutty…uh…internet snake…or something. Just like those fagwads at Wrestling Uncensored did. It’s the circle of life, motherfuckers, deal.
On our message board, there have been rumblings that our stable of old-skewl legends are going to cough up long-awaited installments of the regular wrestling content-based comedic posts that made Lethal the last survivor of the IWC Holocaust that took lesser sites down years ago. I’m not talking about “Please listen to me Vince” state-of-the-business bitchfests, or drooling like a virgin over the fake-titted sluts whose matches we utilize as pissbreaks. I’m talking about chuckleyuck pigfuckery imbued with Lethal’s trademark disrespect for the art of professional wrestling.
While none of us can be arsed to watch this shit every week, let alone post about it, we spend every day bitching about how…shitty…this…shit is. Which means we still care.
We care a lot.