Lethal Politics: Yeah Motherfuckers – I’m Branching Out

He Abides

You faggots thought all I could complain about was shitty booking in professional wrestling? SWERRRRRRRRRRRVE – I can bitch about anything. I thought I’d try my hand at something as scripted and contrived as professional wrestling. Politics is a work! Read my takes on gays, the 2012 election, death by lethal injection, and more!

I consider myself a bit of a “centrist” when it comes to most politics. Like most Americans, I am completely disenfranchised with the political establishment, and have abandoned just about all hope in the broken two-party system of legislation. I believe most citizens do not conform to such tightly-defined boxes.

I’m pro choice, and pro death penalty.

I’m pro gay marriage, and pro gun rights.

See? Who do I vote for based on those platforms? With a 12% approval rating in the legislative branch of government, my vote is to “abort” most of the current Congress and try to start fresh.

So strap in, I’ll hit a few topics.

At 11:08pm last night, a man named Troy Davis was executed in Georgia for killing a police officer back in 1991. The conviction was based almost entirely on the eyewitness testimony of nine people. Since the time of the verdict, many of those witnesses either changed or completely recanted their original statements.

I know that for a lot of Americans, any time you have a pass to legally kill a black man in the South, common sense is not going to stop the process. I’m disappointed in the American legal system because a man died yesterday with lingering doubt as to his innocence. I was under the impression that it was supposed to be “innocent until proven guilty” and the caveat to that is “beyond a reasonable doubt”. Especially in cases where the offender is put to death, you better be damn fucking sure that the guy is 100% guilty. Something where the guy is caught on tape blowing someone away, admits that he did it, 5 people saw him do it, and he posted on his facebook a big manifesto about why he did it: Yeah, string that fucker up.

It’s a sad day for America. I don’t know if the guy was innocent or guilty – I know that there was a LOT of questioning about the case, and that alone should be enough to at LEAST postpone things and look into it further.

Speaking of the broken court system: When the Supreme Court decided that Corporations were people, and money was “free speech”, the majority of Americans lost any chance at having an actual voice in Washington. If you wonder why there is ANY problem passing legislation that puts any type of tax, responsibility, or regulation on these corporate “people”, look no further than the fact that officially our politicians are now legally bought by the top 1% of the population.

I’m no Obama supporter – at least until his recent hard-ass “heel” turn where he’s not going to take any more shit from the bullies who have been pushing him around for the past two years. I’ll pose some pretty simple questions for my right-wing friends who seem to think that everything that the economists, congressional budget office, and common sense says.

Look, if you make 250k a year, vote Republican. Chances are you don’t give a fuck about helping your fellow man, because you are a well off prick who got rich stepping over top of the masses. Good for you.

I’ll try to make some very simple observations about where we are:

– Corporate profits in America reached RECORD (as in, holy shit corporations have never made more money ever in the history of the world) in the most recent reports.

– Corporate tax rates (the effective tax rates) have not been lower or less regulated than they currently are.

Let’s start with this one real fast, since the “job creators” are posting record profits. We used to call this “voodoo economics” in the 1980’s, and it didn’t work then. Ronald Reagan, the Lord and Savior of the Republican Party, raised taxes three times during his administration. The concept is that the “job creators” will run successful businesses and with lower taxes and regulation – will be able to hire more workers, pay better wagers, and funnel that money back into the economy.

In the words of a great poet of our generation: “Really? REALLY? REALLY!!!??? … Really.”

Now that’s what we are stupid middle-class Americans are supposed to believe, because that’s the rhetoric that FOX News tells us is the truth.

Here’s what ACTUALLY happens:

“Dear Mr. CEO. Your company posted record profits. The point of a corporation, the SOLE purpose of a corporation, is to maximize profits so that stock prices remain high, the executives get massive bonuses, and the business keeps growing. Not the BUSINESS itself, but rather the profits. So outsourcing some more jobs to a call center in India where labor costs are 1/3rd of what they are in America? Great idea for the corporation. Cutting thousands of jobs and “streamlining” operations? Awesome for the bottom line. You know what’s NOT good for profits?

Hiring people.

Some more facts:

President George W. Bush came into office with a budget surplus, a booming economy, and a generally good situation. Yes, the tech-bubble and a couple of ill-advised wars put a damper on all of the creamy goodness that W. came in with – but those are the facts. W. left office mired in two shitty wars costing trillions of dollars (and counting), and what amounted to $1.7 TRILLION dollars in deficit JUST based on his tax cuts. That’s not me saying it – that’s the PEW and the Congressional Budget Office. Those tax cuts have been in place for a decade, and Bank of America just announced it was cutting tens of thousands of additional jobs. We have the lowest tax rate that we’ve had in 50 years.

So that seems to be working?

The total debt was around 9 trillion under W. Now it’s around 15 trillion give or take. Every time jobs legislation (or any legislation) is attempted, it is blocked by Tea Party Republicans who believe that government should just take its ball and go home.

Vote your wallet in 2012. Chances are unless your daughter is a filthy whore, you won’t need to worry about a pro-life candidate. Shouldn’t you focus on a candidate who could actually AFFECT you in your own day-to-day life? Maybe something like trying to pass jobs legislation to look out for the little guy?

Oh, and if you vote for a candidate who doesn’t believe in evolution: Kill yourself. I believe in Darwin, and survival of the fittest. Clearly both you, and your candidate are retarded. You might as well vote for someone who thinks the world is fucking flat.

Republicans hate science, but they LOVE killin stuff! There have been 273 convictions for murder that have been overturned because of improvements in forensic and DNA evidence. You know what else Republicans hate? Fags. The end of “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” is a sad day for old codgers like John McCain.

Remember Clayton Bigsby on Chappelle’s Show?

Tell That Nigger!

There are still areas of the country where they still don’t believe that the Civil Rights Act happened. Corners of the South where “Mornin’ Nigger” is still an acceptable greeting. The racism is out in the open, and accepted. Those are the same areas of the country that will hold on to the idea that sexual orientation is a means to be discriminated against. They also probably still don’t think that women should vote. I’m sure that 20 years from now there will still be old rednecks sitting on the porch of their trailers talking about how this country sucks since those faggots got the right to not only die for their country, but get married and be happy too!

Nobody wants to be the last person hanging on to an outdated and non-functioning way of thinking.

Congrats to the 14,000 service men and women who can now rejoin the military. Your reward? Go to Afghanistan and fight in a bullshit never ending economy-draining war with no purpose!

Oh, and the fact that there is even a MOMENT of deliberation over helping the tens of thousands of Americans who lost everything in the wake of some of the most devastating natural disasters in this country’s history is disgusting.

Then again, we vote for this stuff.

This is the America that we want.


Well, this is the America that we let exist.


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About Spiffy Sean Styles

354th ranked wrestler in the world according to Pro Wrestling Illustrated. Old School WU and Lethal mainstay. Currently the lead singer and manager for popular national Jager Band "Walk of Shame" (http://jagermusic.com)

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