In tonight’s episode, I point out movies that you should see or that you may have passed on because you think you’ve seen everything. Well, Mr. Fancypants, maybe you haven’t and you should give these a shot! If you’re a horror fan, you owe it to yourself to see these.
Synopsis: A young woman wakes up not remembering who she is, but what she does know is she needs to run the hell away from a killer wearing a chrome mask.
Review: The movie starts off rather quickly with the heroine waking up from unconsciousness and trying to find her way around the funeral home. She sees an old man killed by a man wearing a chrome mask and a shoulder cam to record his evil deeds. Knowing that he’s being watched he goes after her and the race is on!
The girl finds people who help her, but how much help they give her is iffy at best. Anyone standing in Chromeface’s way gets killed and killed good! Easily the highlight of this movie is the incredible level of blood and gore they put into the kills. Watching a guy getting his face sawed off with a knife gave me goosebumps, the amount of work they put into the effects is impressive. Watching the extras on the disc, everyone comes off as knowing exactly what they’re doing and what they want.
The movie doesn’t go out of its’ way to be something NEW in the slasher genre, you have seen this movie before, but it’s done so well you don’t mind. Other than the feeling of familiarity, there’s nothing I can fault this movie for.
Overall: Putting it bluntly, Laid to Rest is probably one of the best modern slashers out there. Get out there and watch it.
Rating: 9 out of 10
Thanks for adding to the bodycount, stranger.
Synopsis: While filming Nosferatu, director F.W. Murneau (John Malkovich) hires Max Schrekt(Willen Dafoe) to play the title vampire, which he plays very well, because he really is a vampire!
Review: Murneau decides to make his masterpiece and takes only a skeleton crew of filmmakers with him to shoot his film. He wants it to be as perfect as can be, budget be damned. He finds a creature of a man to play his vampire, but he doesn’t need make up. His scenes can only be filmed at night, and every now and then a cast member or a set builder goes missing. You can probably figure everything out.
What we get is a nice period piece and a genre film to boot. Malkovich is awesome as Murneau, who slowly descends into madness to make sure his movie is done the way he wants it. Defoe is perfect as Max Schrek, one of his best performances I’ve seen. The rest of the cast, including Cary Elwes and Udo Kier, only add more class to this picture.
I like these movies where they take something real and make it a “What if?” type of movie. Sometimes it can be disastrous but in the right hands you’ll get an incredible movie. We get the latter, it’s really one of the better vampire movies out there. FUCK Twilight.
Overall: A well-made, classy horror movie.
Rating: 9 out of 10
"Wolverine ain't got shit on me."
Synopsis: Genetically mutated sheep get pissed off and start ripping the guts out of every Kiwi (New Zealander) that gets in their way. Seriously!
Review: Our hero, Henry, has been afraid of sheep since he was little, thanks to his older brother scaring the piss out of him with sheep every chance he got. After a few years away from the sheep farm, he’s come back just to sell his share of the farm and put his past to rest. His brother has taken over but has been getting into genetically engineering his sheep to make em bigger. And tougher. And unfortunately, badder.
The herd breaks out and starts to tear apart every person they run into. Yes, you will see sheep tearing off limbs, ripping innards out, dogs and cats living together, mass hysteria! Apparently Henry may be the only one who can save the day, but can he overcome his fear of sheep? By now I hope you realize this was never meant to be taken seriously. Sure there’s a few scary scenes but it’s also hilarious. If there’s one man who can appreciate gore and humor, it’s Peter Jackson. He didn’t direct or write or produce, but he saw what was going and had his WETA Workshop (whose work you may have noticed in the Lord of the Rings trilogy) help out with the movie’s effects and they certainly help out a lot.
It’s rare for a movie to combine scares with laughs and succeed. Evil Dead 2, Dead Alive and Slither are pretty good examples. It’s a good way to gauge if you’ll like this movie or not. The idea of killer sheep is a silly turn off for most, but they’re the ones missing out on a good time.
Overall: Silly premise aside, this movie’s a gory mess of a comedy, get a group together and laugh away.
Rating: 8 out of 10
The blood makes the grass go down easier.
Synopsis: A camera crew follows a man who is creating a new slasher icon, following all the traditions of those that came before him. When things get too real, the crew starts to wonder where they draw the line.
Review: Reality TV has gone too far and there are documentaries that are made about everything. But how about a documentary about a guy who creates, from the ground up, a new face of horror in the vein of characters like Freddy and Jason? A man invites a documentary crew to follow him and he shows everything, from creating the mythology of the character to how he works out before he goes to slaughter a group of teens. It’s a great turn on the slasher genre as we see every aspect of what a killer does “behind the scenes” if you will.
Behind the Mask follows just about every horror stereotype, including Leslie’s doctor (played by Robert Englund doing a great Loomis impression) searching for him to help him. Everything you see though is presented it in a different light. Vernon goes to great lengths to show just how he plans to do everything, including setting up all the kill areas prior to a house party, picking out his virgin heroine who will be his nemesis. All the while, the cameras roll on the madman until it may be too late.
The documentary-style filmmaking is not for everyone, it may even bore people. But if you’re a slasher fan and you’re tired of everything out there, you should give this one a shot. It’s smartly written while following the usual horror conventions you know by heart.
Overall: A great spin on the usual slasher genre, it’s definitely worth watching if you’re a fan.
Rating: 8 out of 10
"Correct! The only way to survive is to blow your stalker."
-Shaun
.
These bots are killing me.