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 With the Raw 10th anniversary show coming up, I thought I’d weigh in with my own fat ass as to which moment was truly the best from a program that recently hasn’t delivered much but in the glorious days of yesteryear has delivered some pretty fantastic moments. Before we get to the top 10, allow me to rip on a few of the WWE’s selections for the show. I honestly don’t know why these were even nominated. The Greatest Upset: 1-2-3 Kid beats Razor Ramon – Is this truly the greatest upset? What about Rocky beating Triple H for his first Intercontinental Title reign? What about any victory by Crash Holly? To nominate X-Pac and a drunk is just dumb. Rock challenges Hogan – Because this is what we all wanted to see, the Most Electrifying Man in Sports and Entertainment trying to carry a match against the Most Washed-Up Man in Sports and Entertainment and the World. And a big Fuck You to all you who cheered the Hulkster on to an Undisputed Title run. The fact he held that belt made me happy they split the championship again. Vince introduces Bischoff – Like we didn’t already know Vince was willing to take on anyone – ANYONE (there’s still hope, Bret) – in a pathetic attempt at ratings. I think 99 percent of us groaned our way through the intro. The other 1 percent took their own lives for fear Russo would be heading Smackdown. And now, on to the top 10. No. 10.: Y2J arrives – It was a great opening for one of the best on the mic. Not only was the mysterious clock finally revealed, but Jericho playing like he was going to cry as the Rock ripped on him made for great TV. (ah, the good old days). No. 9: Triple H ruins Steph’s wedding to Test – OK, so we all knew Triple H would find a way to ruin the ceremony. But by taking Steph to a drive-up wedding chapel? Not only creative, but hilarious – especially when Triple H did Steph’s voice for her. No. 8: The Milkman Cometh – Easily the best self-parody the WWE ever did. Kurt Angle comes out, drenches the Alliance in milk, then proceeds to drink two cartons atop the milk truck a la the Stone Cold beer truck. Parody rules. No. 7: TLC 2002 – Jericho’s spill from the ladder alone made it good enough for the top 10. It gets even better thanks to RVD going coast to coast. No. 6: Stone Cold beer truck – In a way, this should be disqualified for all the beer Austin wasted on this bit. Still, to see the Rock and his $500 shirt get drenched left me cheering for the man like never before. And Vince and Shane certainly did their parts – watch the streaming video and tell me that isn’t a great sell job. You’d think they were being sprayed with piss. No. 5: Y2J beats Triple H – Jericho seemed destined to be the company’s top face during this time. Stone Cold was injured, Rock was doing “The Mummy Returns,” and there was nobody to really feud with Triple H. Enter Jericho, who shot to popularity with his rips on Stephanie (Trash bag ho is still one of my favorite lines of all time) and a couple of good feuds with Chris Benoit. He wins the title before Triple H uses his power to take it back and fire Earl Hebner. It was probably Jericho’s peak in the WWE (Sorry, but I’m not as big on Jericho as a heel). No. 4: This Is Your Life, Rock – If there was a bigger comedian in the WWE than Mick Foley, I don’t know who it is. Even though the segment was almost too long, it was still packed with hilarity and made up for the fact Mick didn’t take one sick bump through it all. No. 3: DX invades WCW – OK, so some of you will say this bit did little to bring about the turnaround in the Monday night ratings wars. And to that I saw: pffffp! This was another moment where wrestling took a backseat to comedy, but oh how funny it was. The best was them not even being able to give away tickets to Nitro. Pure comedy. No. 2: Stone Cold vs. Iron Mike – Proving that wrestling is better without the newsboards, I fell for this angle hook, line and sinker because I didn’t know any better. Who’d have thought, the beer-swigging redneck vs. the craziest former heavyweight boxing champ of the world would be such ratings gold. It also helped take some of the pressure off Shawn Michaels, who was THIS close to being in a wheelchair at the time thanks to his injured back. No. 1: Mick wins his first WWF title – This episode also gets my vote as the top overall broadcast of Raw I’ve ever seen. DX comes out at the top of the show to announce they’re in cahoots with Mankind, who, along with DX, has heat with Vince McMahon’s Corporation. Exercising his power, Vince pits a much-less muscular Triple H vs. Mick for a spot in the upcoming Royal Rumble. Triple H wins the match, then tells Mick he has a consolation prize for him and pedigrees Shane, who was the special ref. Mick puts him in some half-ass stretch hold, which prompts McMahon to come out and save his son by meeting Foley’s demand for a title shot against The Rock. Cut to the main event, where Mick and Rock do battle while DX and the Corporation fight on the outside. Suddenly, Stone Cold’s music hits, he runs to the ring, pummels Rocky with a chair and lays Mick on top for the 1-2-3. DX hoists Mick on their shoulders and carry him as Mrs. Foley’s baby boy finally sees his dream come true. Heartwarming? Sure. Cheesy? Perhaps. But so what? It made for great television and set up the classic I Quit match at the Royal Rumble where Mick took like 40 billion chair shots while handcuffed. Prior to that he did a death dive on top of some audio equipment that sent many sparks flying. Good stuff all around. Sherlock If it’s wrong to love Mick Foley, then I don’t want to be right. |